Fifa’s new football agent test will FINALLY root out the highway robbers Dick Turpin would be proud of
WELL, here’s a question that will test most agents — but one they should know the answer to.It’s one of several set by Fifa for new football agents, regarded by many club staff as close relations to blood-sucking leeches.
Fifa will implement a new test for football agentsCredit: Getty
Q) Which age range covers when training compensation can be due to the club(s) at which the player spent their development period?
a) 12-15
b) 12-23
c) 12-21
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d) 16-23
Now this question is tricky enough without being made more so by the level of English usually associated with foreigners shakily trying to make themselves understood.
So pity the aspiring, perspiring agent asked to unravel the newly minted tortures ordered by our football overlords.
Having translated the knotty question above we come to the point: Fifa — for once, God bless them — are tackling the highway robbers who sometimes double as agents.
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There are exceptions, I should in fairness add, who are hard-working, reliable and honest. God bless the Few.
The best of them are almost essential for any outstanding player: sound advice; attention to the fine print of contracts, not only of those reached with his club but with sponsorships that can be worth multi-millions; negotiations and sometimes massage of ego and confidence.
As an England regular, Gareth Southgate used to conduct contracts personally but at his playing level today the self-assured might not always be very successful.
Even so, unscrupulous cheque-chasers have long warranted the time of comeuppance. I was one of many in football to cheer Fifa’s recent legislation which in one exquisite day announced that the entitlement to agents in future would be three per cent of a player’s pay above £180,000 a year and ten per cent of a transfer fee.
In many cases these payments amount to a fortune. Think ten per cent of £100million to give you some idea of the possibilities.
You may be sure that agents of any stamp will be able to work the figures out. They have always been better at that than understanding the complexities of football finance.
There are further restrictions to the rules which apply from September — so many that rookie agents are undergoing tests that include the question above, which I pray they can translate.
To be fair, this isn’t a patsy examination. And it shouldn’t be. Far too many agents have been holding clubs to ransom, a process that Dick Turpin would have enjoyed, except that the highwayman galloped off on Black Bess while the agents were driven away in a black limousine.
That three-party transaction, seller-player-buyer, is soon to be forbidden.
On Wednesday, hundreds of men and a few women turned up in London for the one-hour test. Forecasts were that only 20 per cent would pass the £300-a-person examination.
Replacing the regulations that were unwisely abandoned eight years ago, the qualification pass rate stands at 75 per cent correct answers.
Previously, agents had to pay only a £500 fee with no exam to try to get rich quick.
Much swotting has been going on, although those who fail to pass have another chance in September, after which they will be welcome to make a profit by their own skills rather than a footballer’s.
Veteran agents will not be called upon to test.
And among those, the commonly held view is that newcomers whose prime motivation was to make a quick buck should face rigorous examination if, to start with, they could understand Fifa’s dense verbiage.
The failure rate could be as high as 80 per cent. This might leave the business as understaffed as the average NHS hospital.
But my suspicion is that agents will be around for as long as balls are kicked for cash. More
