JUST because you’re paranoid, it doesn’t mean they’re not after you.
As Wolves boss Gary O’Neil continues to realise.
Wolves were the club who raged against the machines and forced a vote among Premier League clubs on whether VAR should be scrapped — only to lose 19-1 because none of their rivals shared their originality of thought.
Believing that technology doesn’t always improve things is becoming one of society’s great taboos.
And then the Ipswich v Everton kick-off gets delayed due to “IT issues at the turnstiles”.
My own digital season ticket has vanished from my so-called smartphone. I never once lost an actual season ticket.
Yet profess a hatred of apps and QPR codes, or whatever they’re called, and suddenly you’re Captain f***ing Caveman.
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Still, rant over and back to Wolves. Of course, football being football, the Molineux club acted largely out of self-interest by bringing that vote.
Last season, Wolves were top of the VAR “hard-done-by league” with a staggering seven overturns going against them.
But they ended up a lone voice of common sense, speaking out against a system which beats the joyous spontaneity out of the game and leaves match-going fans frequently baffled.
On Sunday, O’Neil’s rock-bottom side were kicked in the teeth again when VAR awarded Manchester City’s John Stones an injury-time winner, despite Bernardo Silva being in an offside position and jostling with keeper Jose Sa.
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The on-field ref Chris Kavanagh — on the scene for a remarkably large percentage of high-profile gaffes — deemed Silva to have been interfering with play, yet VAR Stuart Attwell disagreed.
Then came Kavanagh’s trip to the VAR monitor — an entirely performative process to give the impression that the referee is still allowed a mind of his own and won’t just automatically do whatever Stockley Park recommends.
Pretty much every great old-school manager from Bill Shankly to Brian Clough is credited with quoting the phrase, “If he’s not interfering with play, what’s he doing on the pitch?”
While that view is too simplistic, we’ve gone too far in the opposite direction.
A set-piece coach will tell you that pretty much every player in the box following a corner is interfering with play — or should be.
This season began with refs’ chief Howard Webb promising a “light-touch” approach to VAR, claiming that only on-field decisions which were genuine clangers would be overturned.
Even those of us firmly opposed to VAR recognised this as an improvement.
This lasted a couple of weeks before being conveniently forgotten — as pre-season refereeing edicts always seem to be.
Now VARs have again started re-refereeing the huge number of subjective decisions which football always throws up.
Because VARs will always be keen to stick their oar in to justify their existence. The system has become a labour-intensive jobs-for-the-boys scheme for match officials. Next, though, to O’Neil’s suggestion of a subconscious bias towards bigger clubs.
This is barely borne out by stats — Fulham and those great “world’s-against-us” conspiracy theorists Nottingham Forest were actually the biggest beneficiaries from VAR overturns last season with five more decisions going for them rather than against them.
O’Neil, though, is right to be paranoid. Just in the wrong way.
VAR simply seems to have it in for Wolves rather than “smaller” clubs in general.
At least this all seems to disprove the age-old idea that refs try to “even things up” if they know they have made a bad error.
Webb has issued so many apologies to Wolves that he must have racked up a serious number of loyalty points with Interflora.
But if any official on VAR duty is acting with a conscious or subconscious knowledge that Wolves have been continually shafted then they do a pretty good job of ignoring this and carrying on regardless.
O’Neil’s job is under threat because Wolves have one point from eight games.
While their fixture list has been extremely tough — and a couple of poor VAR decisions have again gone against them — that’s clearly not good enough.
Should O’Neil get the sack his next job will probably be in the EFL, where clubs admirably refuse to follow the Premier League into mechanised mayhem.
Or perhaps his next gig should be in Sweden — the only western European nation to keep VAR out of its top flight.
Or in Norway, who may scrap it due to widespread fan opposition — with matches having been delayed by irate supporters throwing pastries, fishcakes and tennis balls on to pitches in protests against VAR.
By common consent, the Scandinavians are beautiful and enlightened people.
As O’Neil would doubtless agree.
VILL TO WIN
HOW would Aston Villa deal with the twin demands of the Premier League and Champions League, we all asked?
By scoring impressive wins in their first two fixtures back in the European elite and achieving their best start to a top-flight campaign this century.
And, with Boubacar Kamara and Tyrone Mings returning from long-term injuries and skipper John McGinn back from a month on the sidelines, things promise to get better still.
Unai Emery is, pound for pound, the best manager in the top flight.
HOWE ABOUT THAT
HAD Eddie Howe left Newcastle in the summer, he would almost certainly have been Gareth Southgate’s successor — ending debate about whether the England boss should be English.
Now with the Toon in midtable — and Chelsea and Arsenal next up — might Howe become available before Thomas Tuchel even starts work?
England outperformed Germany in four tournaments under Southgate.
But when it comes to coaching and management, the Germans still hold sway. See, for example, Brighton’s child genius Fabian Hurzeler getting the better of Howe on Saturday.
SQUAD DEPTH
HOW is the five-sub rule affecting Premier League football? It is leading to far more comeback wins and, as predicted, giving more advantage to bigger clubs with deeper squads.
Last season provided an all-time high of 63 comeback wins in the top flight (16.5 per cent).
This year we’re at more than 21 per cent.
Of the weekend’s nine top-flight fixtures, five were won by the team conceding first, including both Manchester clubs, Tottenham and Aston Villa.
NO WAY, JOSE
AS Erik ten Hag limps grimly on as Manchester United manager, a party of Mancunian old-boys lie in wait in Istanbul for Thursday’s Europa League visit to Fenerbahce.
Not just boss Jose Mourinho but also ex-United players Sofyan Amrabat and Fred as well as former City title-winning striker Edin Dzeko, 38.
Lose to that little lot and it really will be “welcome to hell”.
STOP GUNS
WILL Sir Keir Starmer’s beloved Arsenal miss out on the league title due to “indiscipline”, after already dropping seven points when reduced to ten men?
We all know the best cure for indiscipline: mandatory National Service. As advocated by Rishi Sunak at the election. That would have taught ’em.
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BUNDLE OF JOY
WHY are baby-related goal celebrations, like Liverpool’s Curtis Jones sucking his thumb and Bournemouth’s Justin Kluivert sticking a ball up his shirt, so irritating?
Because they remind us Premier League stars are the only men in the country who can afford to have kids in their 20s.
Source: Soccer - thesun.co.uk