CRUSADER for social justice, Member of the British Empire, winner of the World Cup Golden Boot?
For a bloke who missed a penalty in last year’s Euros final and appeared to be shot of confidence just a few months ago, this World Cup has represented a wondrous resurrection for Marcus Rashford.
In the space of two second-half minutes, Rashford and England’s latest people’s champion, Phil Foden, settled the World Cup’s first ever Battle of Britain, sent the Welsh packing and booked a last-16 clash with Senegal on Sunday.
By the time the Manchester United forward had added England’s third – and his own third of this tournament – he was tied at the top of the scoring charts.
Gareth Southgate had taken the popular choice of shaking up his forward line after a grim goalless draw with USA – and the move came up trumps as Foden and Rashford seized on the opportunity of this World Cup.
The England boss faces some tough decisions now.
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Bukayo Saka scored twice against Iran and Raheem Sterling has been a nailed-on starter for years.
Yet surely he can’t drop Rashford or Foden after this?
England were poor for half an hour, began to spark late in the first half, but only really clicked after 1990s one-hit wonder Chesney Hawkes had belted out ‘The One And Only’ on the pitch at half-time.
Well, whatever gives you inspiration, fellas.
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For Wales, this was little short of humiliation.
Captain Gareth Bale was hauled off at half-time and England might easily have doubled their winning margin as they tormented Rob Page’s men.
Southgate had used an infamous video of Welsh players wildly celebrating England’s Euro 2016 defeat by Iceland to motivate them before this match.
And there was a touch of sadism about the way they toyed with the Welsh in the second half.
It was actually a match Southgate would rather have avoided – just like last year’s Euros clash with Scotland.
British derbies have a potential for chaos – blood feuds where the little brother is pumped up to spill some claret.
Yet Wales couldn’t lay a glove on England.
They looked like a bunch of tourists, just happy to be here.
Southgate had also handed Kyle Walker and Jordan Henderson their first starts of the tournament, while pushing Jude Bellingham forward into a No10 role, where he excelled.
After waiting 64 years to reach a World Cup, the Welsh had only really turned up for one half of football, the second against USA.
Page switched to a back four in an attempt at positivity – but it didn’t work.
For all the pre-match talk of passion, the start was more cat-and-mouse than fire-and-brimstone.
England created one early opening – Declan Rice winning a tackle, Harry Kane slipping through a pass to release Rashford, who failed to lift it over the on-rushing Danny Ward, in for the suspended Wayne Hennessey.
Foden – who’d been talked up into the new Gazza, perhaps even the Stockport Maradona, while sat on the bench – attempted only simple passes early on.
England were bossing possession, stretching the Welsh defence but lacked early inspiration.
Harry Maguire went on one rampage – then duffed his shot so badly that it went out for a throw-in.
Neco Williams was subbed due to concussion, some time after taking a Rashford shot full in the face.
Shortly before half-time, England began to wake up.
One sharp counter-attack ended with back-heels from both Bellingham and Walker before Foden swivelled and shot waywardly.
Rashford tried a bicycle kick, Foden rode a tackle, John Stones stretched Ward with a header from a corner and England were showing serious warning signs.
It wasn’t until first half injury-time that Wales had a shot – Joe Allen bending one narrowly off target.
Bale had been totally anonymous on the right flank, beaten to every ball by Luke Shaw, and Page hooked him at half-time, in favour of Brennan Johnson.
But that switch didn’t work at all for the Welsh – and, after Chesney had done his thing, England were two-up inside six minutes of the restart.
Foden was fouled by Joe Rodon 25 yards out and Rashford arrowed the free-kick into the top corner, leaving Ward grasping at air.
Suddenly England were full of it and almost immediately Rashford dispossessed Ben Davies, allowing Kane to steer a low centre to the far post where Foden picked his spot coolly.
The Manchester City man blew kisses at his adoring public.
It was game over.
As against Iran, England had shown the killer instinct to score in bursts – three goals in six minutes in their opener, two in two here.
Kieffer Moore’s deflected shot forced Jordan Pickford to change direction and make a tasty save.
But England knew they were home and hosed and Southgate brought on Trent Alexander-Arnold, Kalvin Phillips and Callum Wilson for Walker, Rice and Kane.
Phillips – who, like Walker, had made a dramatic recovery from injury to make it to Qatar – lofted a lovely pass down the right flank for Rashford, who turned Connor Roberts inside out and scored at the near post with a shot which embarrassed Ward.
“Three-nil in your cup final!” bellowed the English.
Soon, Rashford almost completed a hat-trick – but Ward stuck out a boot to save at the near post.
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Southgate embraced Rashford warmly when he made way for Jack Grealish soon after.
His was an inspired selection, even more so than Foden’s.
Source: Soccer - thesun.co.uk