OLYMPICS legend Dame Kelly Holmes has revealed she’s gay – after living a “secret life” for decades.
The 52-year-old sporting hero, who is in a happy relationship, says she wanted to “scream” about her sexuality for years – but felt unable to speak openly.
Olympics hero Dame Kelly Holmes has revealed she’s gay and in a relationship after struggling with her mental health for yearsCredit: GettyThe national treasure suffered episodes of self-harm as she feared being outedCredit: AFP
She bravely chose to break her silence during Pride month after “dark times” when she considered taking her own life.
Dame Kelly, who served in the Army, told the Sunday Mirror she first realised she was gay when she kissed another female soldier at the age of just 17.
But she bottled up her true feelings for years – and suffered episodes of self-harm.
Even her celebrations after she won gold in the 800 and 1,500 metres at Athens were spoiled as she feared being outed.
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The national treasure told the paper: “I needed to do this now, for me. It was my decision. I’m nervous about saying it.
“I feel like I’m going to explode with excitement. Sometimes I cry with relief.”
Dame Kelly feared she’d “still be in trouble” if she’d admitted to being gay while in the Army, although family and close friends have known of her sexuality for years.
She joined the Women’s Royal Army Corps in 1988, a month before her 18th birthday.
At the time, the forces had a ban on LGBT soldiers, which was only lifted in 2000.
After her first kiss with another woman, Kelly wrote to her stepdad to tell him what had happened.
“I was confused and a bit scared of what it meant,” she said.
“But he accepted it straight away”.
She went on to have relationships with other female soldiers during her 10 years of service, risking court martial, and came out to the rest of her family in 1997.
Between the ages of 27 and 32, she was in a relationship, but broke it off so she could focus on the Olympics.
By 33, however, her mental health began to suffer.
In 2003, she self-harmed before the World Championships final in France, running a tap to drown out the sound of her tears.
“I felt I had no control over myself,” she said.
“Yet at the same time I had this pull to succeed, thinking, ‘If I win gold it’ll all be ok’.”
I feel like I’m going to explode with excitement. Sometimes I cry with relief
Despite her grief, she didn’t ask for support as she was terrified of being dropped from Team GB.
In 2020, she suffered Covid and a breakdown – and contacted a military LGBTQ+ leader to ask if she could still face sanctions for her Army relationships.
When the advocate reassured her, Kelly says: “I felt like I could breathe again.
“One little call could have saved 28 years of heartache.”
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She is now working on a doc called Being Me about her experiences.
For more information on how to seek support if you’re affected by the issues in this article, visit NHS.uk
Dame Kelly first knew she was gay when she kissed another female soldier at the age of 17Credit: Not known, clear with picture deskShe immediately wrote to her stepfather, who was supportive, and has had relationships with womenCredit: Getty HultonBut she’s now come out to her millions of British fans to celebrate Pride monthCredit: BBC / Blast! Films Ltd
YOU’RE NOT ALONE
EVERY 90 minutes in the UK a life is lost to suicide.
It doesn’t discriminate, touching the lives of people in every corner of society – from the homeless and unemployed to builders and doctors, reality stars and footballers.
It’s the biggest killer of people under the age of 35, more deadly than cancer and car crashes.
And men are three times more likely to take their own life than women.
Yet it’s rarely spoken of, a taboo that threatens to continue its deadly rampage unless we all stop and take notice, now.
That is why The Sun launched the You’re Not Alone campaign.
The aim is that by sharing practical advice, raising awareness and breaking down the barriers people face when talking about their mental health, we can all do our bit to help save lives.
Let’s all vow to ask for help when we need it, and listen out for others… You’re Not Alone.
If you, or anyone you know, needs help dealing with mental health problems, the following organisations provide support:
